This afternoon I had a few minutes in the music hall and I realized something rather profound. After 18 years of feeling not warm feelings towards this instrument, something has changed about the way I see it. I think it felt like an enemy for a long time...that sounds strange, but it's true...I dreaded recitals and requests to play at people's houses and especially playing all by myself at church. I had some bad experiences and so often have felt like it was going to let me down when I was all by myself in front of a whole bunch of people. I know it's not really "its" fault, and that it's up to my fingers or the part of my brain that stores all that stuff. But today I realized that I'm not afraid of the piano anymore and that I in my own way know how to work with it. I'm never going to be a concert pianist which is A-OK with me! And for my purposes I'll be okay. Instead of feeling like something that I had to conquer, this afternoon it sort of felt like an old friend and I'm really glad about that.
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